Thursday, February 09, 2006

It's Michelle Malkin's fault!

As I was perusing the blog world last night, I ran across an uber-liberal, sorry, I mean progressive blog that explained the current cartoon carnage is actually Michelle Malkin's doing. Who would have thought that! You know how it is. When something happens we have to, absolutely must find out who is to blame. Someone is to blame for everything, even hurricanes. It's usually George W. Bush. Sometimes we can blame any ol' Republican. Inevitably it's America and/or an American. Once in a while, just every once in a while, we can blame something on Britian. But usually it's Bush's fault. That's pretty much a given, so it surprised me a little to see that the cartoon riots are Michelle Malkin's fault. I had to read on. The author of the blog offered proof positve of Ms. Malkin's culpability in this global conflict. It seems that Ms. Malkin created this story so that she could be the primary source of information on the conflict. And, low and behold, hers has been the go-to blog for news on the cartoons and the riots!!! Proof! I've noticed Ms. Malkin has had trouble getting people to visit her blog and worried about her every single day. Poor thing. Further proof is offered in the fact that the signs carried by the protesters are written in English! The progressive thinking blog author writes that obviously the rioters would write their death threats in their native tongues (plural). In addition, she points out that the same person had to have written each sign because the letters are the same. She points specifically to the 's's' (how does one write the plural of 's'?) Writing the signs in English and with all the 'S's the same was a major oversight on Ms. Malkin's part! She might want to make a note of that for the next time she wants to create world conflict. Why, I thought, would Ms. Malkin invent this crisis? Surely she could have gotten more blog traffic without creating a major global conflict! She could have tried Blog Explosion, for instance. There are other ways, I'm sure any number of people would have helped her had she only asked. She didn't have to incite bloody, fiery mobs bent on the utter destruction of Western civilization and killing any and every one who is not Muslim! That's just a tad extreme, I thought. Then, finally, the author of the progressive blog revealed the real motive behind Ms. Malkin's nefarious doings! It seems Ms. Malkin's husband is Jewish. Ah-ha! We know about the Zionist Conspiracy. There have been lots of Zionist conspiracies. It seems this is just another example of how Israel routinely pulls the wool over the world's collective eyes. After all, look at how Israel orchestrated 9/11 just to turn America against Muslims! I had no idea Michelle Malkin had so much power. Now I'll be walking on eggs when I read her blog. How does one act? There are protocol for behavior when one meets the President or Royalty or the Pope. What is the protocol for reading this all-powerful blogger's blog?? Let's recap. Michelle Malkin created this crisis in order to get more traffic on her blog but she really was just a pawn in the larger conspiracy of the Zionists who play on the innate biogtry of the fly-over-country-hillbilly-backward-ignorant citizens of the United States. All of this so that Israel can dominate the world. Furthermore, if you think otherwise, you are a bigot and a racist. As per the progressive blog writer. Are you taking notes? Okay. Remember. We are bigots if we think the Muslim world is waging war against us. We are not bigots if we think the Jewish world is sneaking around getting the Muslim population to act-out in front of the cameras so we'll all be outraged by their behavior. Got it? So, if we are sophisticated enough, we will understand that what we see and hear is not real but a complicated highly orchestrated scheme to make us wage war against the Muslim world so that Israel can take over the world. Makes your head hurt doesn't it?
I wrote this post and when I hit the upload button it disappeared. I've re-written it. Could it be that Michelle Malkin made it disappear?? Just to be on the safe side I'll be practicing my bowing and genuflecting.

Quote Of The Day: Blue Star Chronicles Excerpt: Beth from BSC, regarding a Moonbat blog theory that the Muslin cartoon riots were caused by Michelle Malkin. Weblog: The Paladin Blog Tracked: 02.09.06 - 6:13 pm

Yak of the Week (02.03 and 02.10.2006) Let's Hear it for PMS! Excerpt: Some of you may have noticed that we didn't make our usual "Yak of the Week" award last week. As it happens, this week we have enough yaks to fill a month, so we're granting both the February 3 award and teh February 10 award simultaneously: Weblog: Random Yak Tracked: 02.10.06 - 10:05 am

Linked to: Is it just Me?; Stuck on Stupid; Adam's Blog; TMH's Bacon Bits; Jo's Cafe; Third World County; Everyman Chronicles; The Liberal Wrong; The Uncooperative Blogger; Cao's Blog; Right Wing Nation; Blogging Out Loud; MacBro's Place ; Basil's Blog; The Bullwinkle Blog; Stop the ACLU